Kozhikode: Father's Day is celebrated worldwide on the third Sunday of June every year, and this year, it falls on June 15. This is a day to honour the love, strength, and sacrifices made by the admirable father figures in our lives.

While most Indian children grow up under the care of both the father and mother, if not the traditional joint family set up, some are raised by a single parent. Most often, it is by a single mother, but there are cases where the child is raised by a single father as well.

While it's relatively less common than single motherhood, single fathers are raising children in India, often with the support of their families, friends, colleagues, and communities. As per a report by the International Journal of Novel Research & Development in 2023, in India, single-mother households still outnumber single-father ones, accounting for 8.2% of the population compared to 2.3% at the national level.

Donning both hats:
Shedding light on the struggles faced by single father in our society, a topic which is mostly brushed under the carpet, Rima Bhandekar, psychologist, Mpower, Aditya Birla Education Trust, said that in traditional Indian societies, deep-rooted gender norms emphasise that men should be the breadwinner and women should nurture and raise children. “A man who’s donning both hats is treated as an unusual person. Such beliefs often have the effect of a single father being perceived as not capable of providing adequately for a child, especially if it's a daughter. Single mothers are often praised and supported for being extra strong and self-sacrificing by people in their social circle and media, while single fathers are usually looked at with pity or doubt,” Bhandekar added.

The silent struggles:
Bhandekar went on to say that there is a strong cultural pressure for men to ‘stay strong and hold it in silently,’ which adds to the layer of stress to parenting, strains relationships, and reduces overall well-being. She said that single parenting becomes especially challenging without trusted support from extended family and friends when balancing the responsibilities of being both the provider and the caretaker. “Lack of support systems specifically for single fathers is also a pressing difficulty. Bonding emotionally with a child takes time and effort, especially without a partner’s support. The communication and support channels for parenting, schooling, and the workplace are mainly oriented towards mothers, making single fathers feel unsupported and less likely to ask for help,” she added.

Urgent need to break stereotypes:
The notion that a man can independently raise a child without a partner is still hard for many communities to accept, so single fathers are often advised to marry so that the child can have a mother. Many single fathers struggle with this unspoken judgement that a man who shows love is rare, Bhandekar said. “We can open up more conversations around how 'parenting' is about love, dedication, and patience, and not confined to a particular gender role,” she added.

Lack of acknowledgement:
Unlike single mothers, who often receive empathy and community support, single fathers are rarely acknowledged in the same way. Mumbai-based clinical psychologist Alishiba Arsud said that their efforts are either ignored or met with surprise. “There’s still a widespread belief that fathers are secondary caregivers. As a result, their stories are often missing from public discussions on parenting. In therapy, I have often seen single fathers carry emotional burdens in silence. Many of them feel they are not allowed to show vulnerability. They suppress feelings of grief, confusion, or self-doubt, thinking that expressing these would make them appear weak or incapable. This emotional isolation can deeply affect their mental health and parenting.”

Impact on children:
Arsud said that the fact that most single fathers are isolated definitely impacts their children. She said, “When fathers feel they must hide their emotions, children miss out on seeing healthy emotional expression from a male role model. This not only affects the father's mental well-being but also the child's emotional development. A parent’s suppressed stress can unintentionally pass on to the child, even if they try to hide it,” she added.

Why are they not spoken of as much as single mothers
Arsud opined that single fathers are not rare—they are just rarely spoken about. “Their silence is shaped by stigma and a lack of societal support. It’s time we shift the narrative to include them. Single fathers are not anomalies. They are caregivers, warriors of quiet resilience—and they deserve space in our conversations on parenting, our policies, and our empathy,” she added.

Impact on the father's mental health:
Being a single father significantly impacts a man's mental health through increased stress, financial strain, loneliness, and societal expectations that often question their parenting abilities. Dr Shruti Khare, a Pune-based psychologist and psychotherapist, said that they may also lack adequate support systems and hesitate to seek help due to traditional expectations of masculinity. “These factors can contribute to higher rates of depression, anxiety, and stress, especially when raising daughters. Traditional gender roles still position women as the primary parent, and custody after separation often favors mothers. Media portrayals tend to idealise single dads while ignoring their real struggles,” Dr Khare added.